your jazz, an unsent letter to a former boss

Your jazz is soft; it is unobtrusive and silky. It is David Sanborn,
it is George Benson, it is Songs in the Key of G. With a genteel
patina all shiny and slick, your jazz is "lite," with a "t-e" not a
"g-h-t."

The instruments of your jazz are bend-less saxophones, synth bass and
the "vibe" setting on an electric piano. Self-effacing, modest and
shy, your jazz fills dentist waiting rooms, supermarket freezer isles
and the escalator well at Nordstrom Rack.

Your jazz is warm but not hot; it is cool but not cold. It is music
for neutral moments; a mauve background for in-between times.
Your jazz is the soundtrack to the first ring of the seventh circle of
hell and should be forced upon no soul-possessing person, most
importantly and specifically, your co-worker.

Take heed.